Monday, January 14, 2008

Ready, Set...Depression!

Yes, I am preparing myself for a fun-filled week of depression..my husband has left me for 6 long, grueling, lonely nights (which would actually be 7 days, but the nights are much, much harder to handle). Not long after we got Dax, Brant left for 3 days to go to a conference in San Antonio. I thought things would be fine and go on as normal, but to my surprise, I was absolutely miserable the entire time he was gone...literally I fell into a depression. It of course made no sense to me because I used to travel and be gone from Brant weeks at a time, he was even gone to Africa for a month and I was ok, but the time he was gone was horrible.

So, I of course did some thinking and realized that there has been a huge development since we both traveled and left each other...NOW WE'RE MARRIED! I never realized how these vows truly change you until now. I hate it when my husband leaves and I long for his return. He is truly my best friend and I look forward to going home after a long day, cooking dinner, walking Dax, then just sitting on the couch talking (or our new favorite thing is working puzzles together). These are the moments I live for.

So when my alarm clock went off this morning, I didn't even try to get out of bed, I just rolled over into the arms of my beloved and fell right back to sleep. 9 minutes later, the alarm went off again, and I still stayed in the arms o f my beloved. I didn't want to leave that spot...my spot where I fit so perfectly because I knew that I would not have this until next Sunday night. After the 3 alarm sounded, my sweet dear husband finally look at me and with his horrible morning breath said "Ashley Gayle, get out the bed." So I began to cry...not just because of how bad his morning breath smelled, simply because I HATE it when he is gone...the bed is colder, the nights are longer and I am terribly lonely without him.

So now he is on a plane, on his way to Phoenix, AZ for the SportsTurf Managers Association Annual Conference. So, yes, I begin a week of loneliness and longing for my little furnace to return to my bed so I don't freeze as much...maybe Dax will sleep in the bed with Mama this week...but we won't tell daddy about it!!!

Much Love,
Ashley

4 comments:

Amanda said...

Awwww! I'm sad for you! I would probably go stay with my mama and she would tell me to "choose joy." Love you!

Janelle & Ella said...

I would do the same thing, go stay with my mama. I'm sorry you have to be alone all week. I know that's a long time. I wish we lived closer so we could sit on the couch together and watch a chic flick and eat popcorn.

Ginger said...

I agree with Janelle..chic flix are the best when hubby's away. I hated it when my husband would leave...and then he left for Iraq and I had 18 months of a big ol' bed by myself...I learned to enjoy it. I could sprawl out and use all the pillows....try to look for the good! Hopefully, your week will pass quickly!!

MamaCass said...

I feel your pain! At least you have Dax to snuggle with.

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